Many individuals harbor misconceived notions regarding facts about the abuse and neglect of older persons. Misconceptions left unchecked can be detrimental to the welfare of a neglected or abused person.

Here are some common myths about elder abuse and neglect of older persons, followed by important facts:

MYTH: Abuse and neglect of older adults is rare.
FACT: It is difficult to determine an accurate percentage of the occurrences of abuse because many victims hide behind a shield of shame and embarrassment. It is difficult for victims to go public with their abuse, which skews any attempts at measurement.

MYTH: Most abuse of older adults occurs in nursing homes.
FACT: Abuse can just as easily occur within the victim's own home. Any caregiver, even a spouse or family member, could be the source of abuse.

MYTH: Mistreatment in later life only happens to people who are very frail.
FACT: Abuse can happen to anyone, even virile men. Abuse comes in many forms including physical abuse, emotional abuse and financial abuse. Emotional abuse can be just as, if not more, damaging than physical abuse. Since the scars are not external, non-physical abuse is much easier to hide and more difficult to prove.

MYTH: Mistreatment in later life only happens to older women, older people who are isolated or older people with disabilities.
FACT: Anyone can become a victim of abuse. The abuser is often a loved one whom the victim trusts. This bond of trust is what allows the abuser to penetrate the victim's self-confidence and challenges the victim's level of self-worth.

MYTH: Sometimes an older person "chooses" to be abused or neglected by staying in an abusive relationship.
FACT: Often the victim feels trapped in the situation because of constraints that include:

• Fear the abuser will act on threats of violence or other malicious intimidations.
• Isolation, which prevents the victim from having someone to turn to for help.
• Finances that are controlled by the abuser, giving the victim little fiscal power to escape.
• Social repercussions, which may prevent a victim from seeking help in an attempt to hide the truth from friends and family.
• Emotional dependence, which prevents the victim from leaving the abuser. Instead, the victim will continue to hope the abuser will suddenly see the error of his/her ways and make a miraculous change for the better.
• Low self-esteem caused by long-term abuse, which forces the victim to think that he/she cannot exist without the abuser or that he/she deserves the abuse.

MYTH: Most abuse of older adults involves physical abuse.
FACT: Physical abuse is often the easiest form of abuse to spot because of easily recognizable physical evidence including bruises, scratches or scarring. However, when verbal, emotional or psychological abuse exists, external indicators can come in forms of behavioral modifications.

MYTH: The abuser is not a loving partner.
FACT: Extreme mood swings can overcome an abusive partner. The abuser will flip-flop between being caring and kind to being abusive through violence or verbal degradation. Many victims identify the behavior with the characters Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde – an angel and a monster wrapped into one person.

MYTH: The victim deserves the abuse and even provokes it.
FACT: The victim will often do everything he/she can do to please the abuser, but to no avail. The abuser will constantly change the parameters of what behavior is acceptable for the victim to exhibit. This leaves the victim hesitant to say or do anything for fear of instigating the "Mr. Hyde" persona.